Words from the Wise

“We have the best smelling house!”

Married from 1949 until 2003 (when Ken passed)

“Every day when Ken walked in the door from work he would say that we had the best smelling house. I think it is important to cook for your husband. Today it doesn’t seem to be a priority.” ~ Leokadya

54 years!! I rarely hear numbers like that these days. I hope we can pick up the slack and carry the torch, for us, and for our children and theirs.

Her grandson shared a memory of his grandfather:

“After every meal he got right up and cleaned the kitchen for my grandma.”

The way I interpret this everyday occurrence is that she served him, and he served her. And, it didn’t feel much like a chore and tallies weren’t kept.


From the Word

Have a Servants Heart

Make an effort to serve the people that you live with. Do the things for them you know they love simply because you know they love them. Do the things for them you know they hate to do simply because you know they hate to do them.

I believe it is an act of service to my husband when I’m running late, to stop, turn around and walk back down the hallway to turn off the lights. It is important to make an effort to make sure the lights are not left on simply because I know it really bothers him. My husband does not like to do the laundry, clean the toilets or do the grocery shopping. While this may not be a list of my favorite things to do, I don’t mind doing them. So why not take on these tasks so that he doesn’t have to? I bet there are some things that bug your husband that aren’t that big of a deal to you. What are they? Are you willing to take them on as an act of service? This works both ways!

In a sermon preached by Holly Furtick at Elevation Church I learned that when we focus on what we can do instead of what the other person is not doing, God works on our behalf. We need to be Jesus and let God be God. Jesus served!

 I prefer not to use the weed eater, cook on the grill or unload the groceries from the car. My husband doesn’t seem to mind helping me with these tasks which fuels me to prep the food for the grill and to put the groceries away once their inside. By serving each other in this way we are able to tackle the little things as a team while also honoring and serving the other person.

 “For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” Galatians 5:13


 “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45

Walking it Out

Keeping up at Home

We can all relate to the feeling of crawling into a bed with clean sheets, right? Let me paint another picture for you. You sit down after a long day on the couch in your living room.  The couch is absent of laundry and clutter, the furniture is dust free, there are no dishes accumulating on the coffee table or dog hair floating in the air. The kid’s toys are in their place. For a few moments you are in a quiet room free of the chaos that has been your day. You may even hear birds chirping. Doesn’t this sound heavenly?

Now, let’s talk reality. No kids yet, but we do have a puppy. Most days when I journey to my couch in the evening I have to walk across what we call Echo’s lair. The pathway requires me to walk over tennis balls, shredded ‘former’ animal toys, bone shrapnel and remnants of whatever laundry he has smuggled out of the laundry room (or off of the couch) and shredded on the floor.

Now, my husband has this supernatural power called compartmentalizing that I believe all women lack. He walks over Echo’s lair and sits on the couch, looks out the window and lets out a sigh. I’m thinking, “How on Earth can he relax in this mess?” and promptly get out the broom and begin sweeping.

My husband often tells me to forget the mess and to just come sit with him. While I love and appreciate this about him I have to tell you it is something that I struggle to do. When the house is in disarray I cannot relax. He is able to overlook things that drive me crazy. On the other hand, when the house is clean he always notices, he always comments on how peaceful our home feels and thanks me for keeping it so comfortable. My husband may genuinely mean that “it’s not a big deal” or tell me to “forget about the mess” but I know how much happier he is when our home feels like a haven. I do believe we are called to keep our homes in order and to prepare a place that our husband actually wants to be.

“She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” Proverbs 31:27

Take time for the truly important moments with your husband and children but remember that everyone enjoys a clean home.

It’s a balance so choose priorities. Making sure the dishes are clean is important and should probably be taken care of each evening before sitting down; however, organizing the pantry can probably wait if it means losing valuable time with your husband. Choose what works best for you but spending time with your spouse should not be at the end of your endless to do list.